Depression.........It's a sunny day outside.I should go out,Not just sit around in my room and hide.I try to make myself get out of bed.And I succeed.But I am still trapped inside of my head.The more I think,The more I try,To convince myself that I am alright.The more I convince myself,The more I feel,That nothing else is real.Besides this pain.I think I might be going a little insane.And excuse me friend,Could you draw a smile on this paper bag I am wearing?After all you're the one I am trying,To hide all of my feelings from.This never ends does it?Another day,I feel useless.And defeated.Maybe I should just let go now,But I still cling onto what little hope,And that is how,Things might be.Just one more breath.One more day,I am closer to my own death.
say something, skylar.and my fingers are freezing as i type these words,the joints only bend at the angles they would takewrapped around your hand.it's cold out here,but i'm reluctant to leave your graveside.i'm immersed in the expectation that a few letters from nowwhen i unfurl your name,my fingers will find warmth or numb so i can't feel.
MonsterThat bony smile across his facea sight to take your breath awayas time erupts and slips its pacea noose of stars that went astrayslips down the sky to find its place.He said he roamed too far afieldthat all his pleas were spurned and shunnedthe hands of god refused to yieldThey only left him dazed and stunnedwith fleshy wounds that never healed.So now he haunts the fields and fensand calls the narrow ways his home.The secrets that no man can ken,the buzzards bleat a wretched droneand turn their backs on drowning men.
eleven.i will starve myselfof wordsuntil my bonesstick outlike sparrowswings.. then illfly awayfree.
WonderlandWhen I'm with youI'm floating in our own littleWonderland-except the Mad Hatter's deadand Alice is sleeping with the Knavebehind the Queen's back.
i'd haunt you if you'd like.my hands are paralyzed and you're waiting for me to touch your face,but that doesn't really matter because i'd rather touch your souland if you close your eyes long enough i'll read you poetry as we lay atop the monkeybarsin this old and rusted parkyou can pretend to know the constellations and point them out to me and i'll tell you they're all beautiful, but nothing compared to youif i'm lucky you'll blush and laugh at me,tell me i say the dumbest things but deep down it'll register in your soul just how much i love youand i know they say you can only save yourself, but darling i swear if you'll just have the slightest bit of faith i'll save the fuck out of you or i'll destroy myself trying,because i honestly can't think of any other purpose for my lifeor what smidge of it i've been able to hold on to.
Do you love me?Do you love me...?You make me feelon top of the worldbut I don't knowwhat your feelings are...Do you love me...?Do you love not...?I made the mooninto a flower, you see!She sure will tell meWhat you're feeling for me!Do you love me...?Do you love not...?I look at you,trying to see your heartBut you're covered upever so smart.Do you love me...?Do you love me not...?I think you're smilingwhen you're talking to me,but through your poker faceit's really hard to see.Do you love me...?Do you love me not...?You make me feelI'm on top of the worldand is your pretty smileto what I hold on.Do you love me...?do you love me not...?I made the mooninto a flower you see!She seems think you arecrazy for me...Do you love me...?Do you love me...? Yeah!
November 2ndIt smells like winterunder the half-moon,where my breathbecomes the skyand gather the starsto my chest.
AnimusIf I couldI would vomit my soulAnd let it chain itselfTo my speech Like a parasite.I would let it Become my puppet master,And let it sway my armsIn directionsI never thoughtI would.Instead, I've kept my soulTrapped in a cageAnd watched itTry to biteIt's way to freedom.